So I am officially back home in the bosom of my family but it feels weird still. I flew back to the states on April 30th with mixed emotions. I was really ready to be back to agreeable food and water, especially after a horrible health scare my last week, yet I wasn't ready to leave my Indian family. In fact, I am still having a hard time not hearing little Ragavee crying first thing in the morning or telling the kids to 'POPOPOPO' (gogogogogo!) as they sneak in our room at 6 a.m.
Since there are so many things I do miss, I feel it appropriate, for the last post of our Indian expedition, to list the top 10 things I the most about the orphanage and India!
10) Eating with my hands. It was probably one of the most freeing experiences ever, to be able to attack the food with your fingers. Of course, it took awhile for me to really understand the art of it because, believe me, eating rice with your fingers is not as easy as it looks!
9) Children's prayer before meals. To watch 25 children chanting their pre-meal blessing was so heartwarming. It was mostly done when guests were providing the meal so the rareness made it all the more special. Still gives me warm chills thinking about it.
8) Indian dress- we had so much fun wearing our sarees and bindi's (pretty jewels and dots on our foreheads) and getting dressed up to go out. I really miss Deepa and Chitra and our make-up sessions with them, getting our hair done 'so pretty sistah' and wearing flowers in our braids.
7) Teaching the children words- hearing Subash and Ranjani state 'I yam tree years' ' My name IS..... Ranjani' I especially miss singing with them and watching them dance. I dont think Skitamarink was ever sung by such a large group of adorable children before! I have videos to prove that statement :)
6) Walking the village road. We tried to walk the road at least once a day, to get out of the orphanage for a while and get a little bit of exercise. Everyone on the road would stop what they were doing and watch us while the kids would run and shake our hands, smiling and yelling "welcome to India!". They couldn't understand why such large, white women would walk to the end of the road for the sole purpose of just walking. They let us know we were nuts on a few occasions :
5) The cooking. Surprisingly, as often as I was sick from the spices and whatnot, I miss Ranjith's cooking styles. I was horrified by the amount of black flies and ants over everything, but I miss how everything was made from scratch, fresh vegetables and chapati and rice. Ranjith made so many varieties of food and I we all liked sitting in there and helping him peel potatoes or chop onions.
4) Early morning children noises. I miss waking up to the babies screaming and laughing, as long as they weren't in our room! I miss walking out in the morning to a chorus of 'good mornin' sistah' with a salute, and we imitated back. They giggled when we saluted back, as it is a sign of respect for their elders. I miss having Ragavee and Aksheya seeing us and starting to wail as they crawled towards us, just wanting us to pick them up and love them. They were good at their act and we fell for their tears every time!
3) Sumathy's and Ranjith's miscommunication with us all. Though frustrating then, now I look back and laugh at all the differences we had to overcome with them both. To try and decipher the two totally different tasks they would assign us during the day left us confused and wishing we could speak Tamil, or they spoke better English! But I think more than anything I miss those two amazing people who made this whole place possible. I cannot put into words the task they have taken upon themselves for the rest of their lives and how really incredible they are.
2) Iyupa's cricket playing. This grown-up 16 year old lived for cricket, so between taking care of babies, household tasks, washing, making food, etc. he would be practicing his 'bowling'(the pitching) while clicking his tounge to imitate the bat hitting the ball. Oh, it made me smile to much, that he can have so much responsibility yet still play games when he has a chance.
1) Watching the children grow. All the other numbers can be interchanged but this is the definite number one thing I miss. The differences we saw in those children in the three months we were there was astounding and we were able to witness Apu's first real steps. Little Rakesh was a real terror at first, but he became much more affectionate and less painful(talk about a pincher!) as he grew to love us. Rekha used to bite the crap out of us as well but we left her as a rolly-polly 3 1/2 year old who was starting to recognize her role as elder sister to the younger babies.
The stories are innumerable we have to tell about our time there, but when it comes to really talking about it it's so hard to put into words exactly what India means to each of us. All I know, personally, is that I will be making a trip back to see my Indian family and am so happy I had the opportunity to be a part of their lives and will forever remember them all!
Thanks again for your support, we have pictures to share if you are ever in Valdez, give Susan or me a ring and we would be happy to share them with you!
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Monday, April 21, 2008
Dust never rests and neither shall we
Actually, dust is the last thing this orphanage is covered in. I think the order would be more like 1)feces and pee 2)bits of rice and sambar (typical Indian rice topping) from previous feedings 3) dirt from the yard 4) flies 5) clean and dirty clothing.... dust may not even be in the top 10! So obviously cleaning is a favorite past time here at BalaGurukulam and something the children take much pride in. It actually gets to a point of insanity because what kid in their right mind would want to clean? For instance, I was busy brushmopping (they have no mops here, they use a broom of hard sticks to 'mop' the floors) the babies sleeping area when 8 yr old Dina came up behind me and demanded the broom. 'No sistah, you no do. I do it best, give it to me'. I argued with him and told him to go play with the other kids and let me clean the room because I was in 'scrub-everything-clean-because-this-place-is-filthy' mode but he persisted. 'Sistah! You go play, I want to clean. Go be with babies and let me mop, I am much faster'. I decided to ignore him and continue mopping despite his protests. Instead of getting the idea and going to play, he went and found another broom and started re-doing everything I had already done! At that point, I decided if he wanted to clean that bad then, shoot, let the kid clean!
The kids are also super obsessed with paper towels, lysol wipes, baby wipes, basically anything you can clean up messes with that isn't newspaper. They were in awe of us disinfecting poop spots with Mr. Muscle(Indian version of 409 or the like) and literally rip wipes out of my hands to clean it up themselves. They love the feel and smell of the cleaning product and will look for any reason to ask for a wipe or 'room spray'(they like the smell too much, just spray it into the air to make the room smell 'very super'). It gets to a point where we see them recleaning spots with baby wipes we had just used to clean a baby's bottom. At least they are getting the idea of soap and disinfectant, though. Neither had been used to clean up after poop before and I hope they continue to use the cleaning products after we have left.
When they clean our bathroom, on the random day father has decided for them to do it, they will use anything to scrub. My favorite was walking in and having it smell overwhelmingly like my shampoo. In fact, they had used half my bottle to clean everything from the floor to the sink and toilet! I guess they really liked the smell, though it is hard to explain to them why exactly that is not the best thing to use. They also like using laundrey detergent bars to scrub at the floor, leaving blue streaks in the crevasses and slippery spots for us to try and dodge while we take a shower. I think they've gotten the point now that we can clean our own bathroom but I keep my shampoo hidden, just in case.
Another thing the kids like to do is dig through our trash. We take our trash bag out to the pile they have outside their gates to be burned. Though not entirely hygenic, it seems to be what most people use here in Ambattur, and in village life in general. Goats and chickens are always digging through the goodies, scrounging what they can. When it gets burned, though, the smell is atrocious, a combination of plastic, old clothing and food. We learned early on to stay away from that smoke when we see it. The kids, however, seem to get into our trash before the burning takes place and we randomly see them playing with our old toothbrushes or diet coke cans. It can be pretty embarrassing sometimes for us but there is no way to stop it, we just have to be on vigilant watch all the time!
The kids are also super obsessed with paper towels, lysol wipes, baby wipes, basically anything you can clean up messes with that isn't newspaper. They were in awe of us disinfecting poop spots with Mr. Muscle(Indian version of 409 or the like) and literally rip wipes out of my hands to clean it up themselves. They love the feel and smell of the cleaning product and will look for any reason to ask for a wipe or 'room spray'(they like the smell too much, just spray it into the air to make the room smell 'very super'). It gets to a point where we see them recleaning spots with baby wipes we had just used to clean a baby's bottom. At least they are getting the idea of soap and disinfectant, though. Neither had been used to clean up after poop before and I hope they continue to use the cleaning products after we have left.
When they clean our bathroom, on the random day father has decided for them to do it, they will use anything to scrub. My favorite was walking in and having it smell overwhelmingly like my shampoo. In fact, they had used half my bottle to clean everything from the floor to the sink and toilet! I guess they really liked the smell, though it is hard to explain to them why exactly that is not the best thing to use. They also like using laundrey detergent bars to scrub at the floor, leaving blue streaks in the crevasses and slippery spots for us to try and dodge while we take a shower. I think they've gotten the point now that we can clean our own bathroom but I keep my shampoo hidden, just in case.
Another thing the kids like to do is dig through our trash. We take our trash bag out to the pile they have outside their gates to be burned. Though not entirely hygenic, it seems to be what most people use here in Ambattur, and in village life in general. Goats and chickens are always digging through the goodies, scrounging what they can. When it gets burned, though, the smell is atrocious, a combination of plastic, old clothing and food. We learned early on to stay away from that smoke when we see it. The kids, however, seem to get into our trash before the burning takes place and we randomly see them playing with our old toothbrushes or diet coke cans. It can be pretty embarrassing sometimes for us but there is no way to stop it, we just have to be on vigilant watch all the time!
Sunday, April 13, 2008
I feel like it just happened, but now that I count the days, it was two weeks ago that we gained three new members to the orphanage. The details about them are unclear due to the normal loss of info that occurs through Ranjith's translations. Navetitra and Ram, a recently orphaned sister and brother, were picked up from a village in the north of the state, and their parents were killed in a road accident. This seems like a clear-cut story, but we are not even certain when their parents died, how they got here or what their ages are although we're guessing that she is 5 and he is 4. In India, a person's age, much like the concepts of truth and time, are relative. We were out of the state when they arrived, and apparently their first few days were a rough adjustment but they seem to be doing much better now. The girl follows Deepa and Chitra, the two oldest girls at 8 and 12, around and mimics their activities. Ram is very chatty (if only we could understand him) and smiley.
The third orphan is a different story. She is in her 80s (we've been told) but looks about 95. She had been living with her eldest son, as is usual for Indian parents, but was kicked out of the house when she become to feeble to perform any household chores. Far too old and weak to work, someone gaveRanjith and Sumathy a call and they picked her up to bring her here to live. She's very friendly even though she doesn't speak English and can't seem to accept the fact that we don't speak Tamil. We're buddies since I helped walk her to the prayer room a few times. And she loooved it when Becca and I wore our sari's yesterday.
Well, it is as good as gold in most cases, at least. There is no such thing as private property at the orphanage, and toys are broken and lost at an alarming rate. Anything within reach of the 3 year olds is rapidly destroyed or covered in excrement (or both at once). Even though the kids have been instructed not to touch anything that is in our room, we've 'lost' plenty of items like two flashlights, my sports bra and a whole box of Orbitz that Becca's mom had sent. Most of the things taken are small things like toys, hard candies and things from home that would have been given to the kids, eventually. I made the mistake of leaving my night time things (my iPod, flashlight and earplugs) in the cubicle once, which has a transparent door that doesn't lock. Becca rescued my iPod from a group of the 3 year olds, and I found 1 and half of my earplugs, which Sharadha had taken a bite out of.
I only have a few days left before I leave and I am extremely sad to go. I really love these kids. There is no way to really describe it without becoming too sappy, and there will be plenty of tears when I leave. The situation is far from perfect and I've been frustrated and sick in ways I could never have imagined, and, at the outset, I didn't think that I would be coming back to India after the trip ended. Yet the discomfort is minor compared to how strongly I feel for the children. It is truly miraculous what Ranjith, Sumathy, and all of the older kids (without whom this orphanage would fall apart) do. I want to come back someday, hopefully soon. I love these kids too much not to.
Kate and Becca have two more weeks, so if you're in Valdez and would like to donate while we're still over here, you can still take the donations by A Rogue's Garden and Kathy will deposit them into the account we access here. And, once again, THANK YOU SO MUCH for all the donations made so far. It is so appreciated, very needed, and actually goes to the children (which, sadly, is a rarity in many orphanages and homes).
If you're in Valdez, see you in May with more pictures and stories!
Aren't they beautiful?
The third orphan is a different story. She is in her 80s (we've been told) but looks about 95. She had been living with her eldest son, as is usual for Indian parents, but was kicked out of the house when she become to feeble to perform any household chores. Far too old and weak to work, someone gaveRanjith and Sumathy a call and they picked her up to bring her here to live. She's very friendly even though she doesn't speak English and can't seem to accept the fact that we don't speak Tamil. We're buddies since I helped walk her to the prayer room a few times. And she loooved it when Becca and I wore our sari's yesterday.
The old woman, or Grandmother as we're supposed to call her, sleeps in the 'cubicle' in the main dormitory that we took turns sleeping in before, and shuffles across the dorm to the restroom with the Western toilet that also opens up into our room. I think the noise and filth of the kids bothers her, so much that she doesn't use the other restroom with the squat toilets that the kids use. Yet she doesn't know how to use a Western toilet, and ends up peeing and pooping on the floor. She is just like the other orphans in that sense, but it is a bit frustrating (and smelly) to have to clean up more excrement in a place (our bedroom and the adjacent restroom) that served as our relatively poop-free sanctuary. Especially since we're not supposed to wear shoes of any kind indoors. One evening when I was sleeping in the cubicle, I started to walk the 30 feet from the restroom to the cubicle across the floor where all the children sleep. Dina, the little 8 year old boss man of the orphanage, noticed that I was wearing a pair of shower flip flops and shouted "Sist-ah! No! Slippahs inside, no!" I had already anticipated this and showed him the bottom of them, which I had scrubbed clean. This did not placate him, so I took them off and tip toed around the piles of poo and urine. Father had told them not to wear shoes (aka slippers) inside, and Father's word is as good as gold.
The cubicle on the right, the bunk beds where the 3 year olds sleep and the floor for everyone else.
Dina, the little boss man at 8 years old, with Tiger, the nice "guard" dog
Well, it is as good as gold in most cases, at least. There is no such thing as private property at the orphanage, and toys are broken and lost at an alarming rate. Anything within reach of the 3 year olds is rapidly destroyed or covered in excrement (or both at once). Even though the kids have been instructed not to touch anything that is in our room, we've 'lost' plenty of items like two flashlights, my sports bra and a whole box of Orbitz that Becca's mom had sent. Most of the things taken are small things like toys, hard candies and things from home that would have been given to the kids, eventually. I made the mistake of leaving my night time things (my iPod, flashlight and earplugs) in the cubicle once, which has a transparent door that doesn't lock. Becca rescued my iPod from a group of the 3 year olds, and I found 1 and half of my earplugs, which Sharadha had taken a bite out of.
Becca with Ragavi.
Ali holding Rakesh and Kate holding Ramesh.
I only have a few days left before I leave and I am extremely sad to go. I really love these kids. There is no way to really describe it without becoming too sappy, and there will be plenty of tears when I leave. The situation is far from perfect and I've been frustrated and sick in ways I could never have imagined, and, at the outset, I didn't think that I would be coming back to India after the trip ended. Yet the discomfort is minor compared to how strongly I feel for the children. It is truly miraculous what Ranjith, Sumathy, and all of the older kids (without whom this orphanage would fall apart) do. I want to come back someday, hopefully soon. I love these kids too much not to.
Akshaya
Kate and Becca have two more weeks, so if you're in Valdez and would like to donate while we're still over here, you can still take the donations by A Rogue's Garden and Kathy will deposit them into the account we access here. And, once again, THANK YOU SO MUCH for all the donations made so far. It is so appreciated, very needed, and actually goes to the children (which, sadly, is a rarity in many orphanages and homes).
If you're in Valdez, see you in May with more pictures and stories!-Susan
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
band-aid sistah?
This is the new favorite saying of the kids here. It seems that band-aids are the 'cool' thing around here now and everyone wants one, wound or not. Little Surya finds old scars that look a little gritty and shows them to us, grimacing as if it hurts to make us think it's something more. Even though we tell them 'no blood, no band-aid' he is a very persistant little boy, batting his eye lashes at us and pursing his lips. We used to fall for that puppy dog expression but not anymore!
Speaking of puppy dogs, I think it is worth talking about the pets of Bala gurukulam.
First off are the cats, two little calico kittens that prowl the grounds for whatever cats prowl for and make some of the strangest yelps I have ever heard. Sometimes we aren't sure if it is a child crying or not and it keeps us a little on edge, especially during the night.
For awhile there, we were taking turns sleeping in a cubicle in the children's room, walls all around but no roof. We have all had a few surprise visits from the cats, suddenly springing from the partial wall onto the bed or vice versa, drawing a few shrill screams in the process. They like to prance around the dormitory and make their weird yelps until someone chases them out the window. Sound like fun house pets, huh? Then we have the fish tank, full of fish from the lake that is a 3 minute walk from the orphanage. Some of the older boys like to go swimming and replenish the stock often, as they tend to eat each other in the tank. I'm not actually sure if they are fed fish food ever or not! At one point, Venkje had even caught a small squirrel and put him in a little wire cage above the snake tank, though I'm not really sure what happened to it. No, they aren't big enough snakes to eat the squirrel but they still make me feel queasy everytime they move, or molt for that matter. Recently, some lizard eggs have appeared in the tank, not sure if it is food or for future playmates, but the kids are anticipating the hatching!
Most importantly are the family dogs, Tiger and Brownie. Tiger is a white mutt and one of the most docile creatures I have ever seen. The kids are constantly poking him, grabbing his tail, his ears, anything they can get ahold of and not once has he snapped or growled at them. Pretty much the only thing I've seen him do is lay around and stare at the gate, or skulk around garbage piles sniffing for food. However, his life hits a climatic point everyday during 'biscuit hour', when the children are presented all kinds of crackers and cookies to keep them enertained for an hour or so. This turns chaotic, as they fight each other for more biscuits or trip and smash their crackers in the process. Tiger unleashes, pouncing on any dropped biscuit he sees before the kids regain their senses and snatch it off the ground. The children watch, mouth agape, as their precious morsels are slurped up mere moments after hitting the earth. Of course we are there to replenish their stock before the tears of despair let loose, but it's funny all the same.
Brownie, however, is the total opposite of Tiger. He is the guard dog, meant to keep people from jumping the fence and, worse case scenario, snatching any children for the slave trade. It hasn't happened, and hopefully never will, but Brownie is a precaution and he is damn good at his job. He is tied up during the day(loose at night), either near the gate or on the opposite side of the courtyard behind some fence, which is my favorite spot for him because he is VICIOUS. Though he loves the children, wouldn't harm them in any way, he hates adults and strangers. He growls, snaps, lunges, anything and everything he can do from his chain to scare the crap out of us. "Look sister, Brownie is laughing" Venkje likes to say with a smile. Even better then that, Brownie likes to get loose. Alot. One of Ranjith's favorite things to talk about is the time Brownie got off and looked like he was headed straight for Susan. Of course, in moments like this, you'd like to think you could be a hero and 'save the children' before your self but knowing Brownie would totally ignore the children she was playing with and go directly for her throat, she freaked. Susan literally jumped over a tree into the garden, shreiking the entire way. Ranjith got quite a laugh and was very impressed with Susan's 'stamina' (we think he means athletic ability when he uses this word?) Usually, Brownie being loose means we all run around with babies in our arms, looking for an unlocked door to hide behind. Venkje is the only one who feels confident enough to approach the dog and put him on the leash again, and even he gets nervous during the task. Though it sounds scary, it's an adrenaline rush we live off of for hours afterwards and we love recount the moments we almost lost our lives to a dog named Brownie.
Speaking of puppy dogs, I think it is worth talking about the pets of Bala gurukulam.
First off are the cats, two little calico kittens that prowl the grounds for whatever cats prowl for and make some of the strangest yelps I have ever heard. Sometimes we aren't sure if it is a child crying or not and it keeps us a little on edge, especially during the night.
For awhile there, we were taking turns sleeping in a cubicle in the children's room, walls all around but no roof. We have all had a few surprise visits from the cats, suddenly springing from the partial wall onto the bed or vice versa, drawing a few shrill screams in the process. They like to prance around the dormitory and make their weird yelps until someone chases them out the window. Sound like fun house pets, huh? Then we have the fish tank, full of fish from the lake that is a 3 minute walk from the orphanage. Some of the older boys like to go swimming and replenish the stock often, as they tend to eat each other in the tank. I'm not actually sure if they are fed fish food ever or not! At one point, Venkje had even caught a small squirrel and put him in a little wire cage above the snake tank, though I'm not really sure what happened to it. No, they aren't big enough snakes to eat the squirrel but they still make me feel queasy everytime they move, or molt for that matter. Recently, some lizard eggs have appeared in the tank, not sure if it is food or for future playmates, but the kids are anticipating the hatching!
Most importantly are the family dogs, Tiger and Brownie. Tiger is a white mutt and one of the most docile creatures I have ever seen. The kids are constantly poking him, grabbing his tail, his ears, anything they can get ahold of and not once has he snapped or growled at them. Pretty much the only thing I've seen him do is lay around and stare at the gate, or skulk around garbage piles sniffing for food. However, his life hits a climatic point everyday during 'biscuit hour', when the children are presented all kinds of crackers and cookies to keep them enertained for an hour or so. This turns chaotic, as they fight each other for more biscuits or trip and smash their crackers in the process. Tiger unleashes, pouncing on any dropped biscuit he sees before the kids regain their senses and snatch it off the ground. The children watch, mouth agape, as their precious morsels are slurped up mere moments after hitting the earth. Of course we are there to replenish their stock before the tears of despair let loose, but it's funny all the same.
Brownie, however, is the total opposite of Tiger. He is the guard dog, meant to keep people from jumping the fence and, worse case scenario, snatching any children for the slave trade. It hasn't happened, and hopefully never will, but Brownie is a precaution and he is damn good at his job. He is tied up during the day(loose at night), either near the gate or on the opposite side of the courtyard behind some fence, which is my favorite spot for him because he is VICIOUS. Though he loves the children, wouldn't harm them in any way, he hates adults and strangers. He growls, snaps, lunges, anything and everything he can do from his chain to scare the crap out of us. "Look sister, Brownie is laughing" Venkje likes to say with a smile. Even better then that, Brownie likes to get loose. Alot. One of Ranjith's favorite things to talk about is the time Brownie got off and looked like he was headed straight for Susan. Of course, in moments like this, you'd like to think you could be a hero and 'save the children' before your self but knowing Brownie would totally ignore the children she was playing with and go directly for her throat, she freaked. Susan literally jumped over a tree into the garden, shreiking the entire way. Ranjith got quite a laugh and was very impressed with Susan's 'stamina' (we think he means athletic ability when he uses this word?) Usually, Brownie being loose means we all run around with babies in our arms, looking for an unlocked door to hide behind. Venkje is the only one who feels confident enough to approach the dog and put him on the leash again, and even he gets nervous during the task. Though it sounds scary, it's an adrenaline rush we live off of for hours afterwards and we love recount the moments we almost lost our lives to a dog named Brownie.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
There is no real way to describe the day to day events since there really isn't such a thing as a 'normal day' at the orphanage, aside from the guarantee of several nap times and several sessions of outright baby mayhem. Random and bizarre events are more the norm, and one day last week was particularly strange.
To feed the babies, usually a giant bowl of rice-and-something (lentils, yoghurt, some liquidy vegetable concoction) is divvied up between several of the older kids, us and/or Sumathy if she is around. We normally have four or five of the kids 3 years old and younger per person and feed them as long as they will sit still by scooping the mixture into their mouths. We had a hard enough time feeding ourselves this way at first, so the poor kids get to wear a lot of the rice by the end of the feeding. I like to think we've improved somewhat. Anyway, immediately after the dinner frenzy Kate and I (Becca was sick) were called over by this older man who lives in the neighborhood. He was an original freedom fighter with Gandhi and is well-respected in the area. He wanted us to come to a 'function' across the street, where two young women were celebrating their coming of age party. Covered in rice remnants and strongly warned by Ranjith and Sumathy several times not to drink the water or eat the food, we walked over in what we were wearing (me in a salwar kamiz, Kate in a beaded floor length skirt and a long t shirt). We were warmly greeted by the father of one of the girls and smiled at by all of the women at the party. We made the usual whimpering noises through our smiles that we make when we have no clue what to say or do but want to make the right impression. The two girls were dazzling in new bright sari's, covered in garlands of flowers and adorned shiny jewels dangling from their wrists, ankles, foreheads and noses. They knelt and bowed at the feet of the older man who brought us there, a sign of respect by 'dusting' the dirt off of his feet. The father said to us, "You do us great honor by coming here and giving them your blessing" and before we knew it, they were kneeling at our feet. This felt entirely awkward and inappropriate to our politically correct, liberal-minded Western upbringing, and we started to back away and say 'No, no' but they were already on the ground. Kate and I looked at each other, laughing with nervousness. Then the girl kneeling at Kate's feet started to stand, catching her headdress on the edge of Kate's skirt. Kate squealed as her skirt started to go above her knees, and both she and the girl turned bright red as they tried to disentangle the beads of Kate's skirt from her jewelry. Everyone at the party found this entirely hilarious, and Kate and I, out of breath from laughing, said goodbye, bowed and walked home marveling at how strange it was that our lives had led up to this moment. But then again, we have said that nearly every day that we've been here.
To feed the babies, usually a giant bowl of rice-and-something (lentils, yoghurt, some liquidy vegetable concoction) is divvied up between several of the older kids, us and/or Sumathy if she is around. We normally have four or five of the kids 3 years old and younger per person and feed them as long as they will sit still by scooping the mixture into their mouths. We had a hard enough time feeding ourselves this way at first, so the poor kids get to wear a lot of the rice by the end of the feeding. I like to think we've improved somewhat. Anyway, immediately after the dinner frenzy Kate and I (Becca was sick) were called over by this older man who lives in the neighborhood. He was an original freedom fighter with Gandhi and is well-respected in the area. He wanted us to come to a 'function' across the street, where two young women were celebrating their coming of age party. Covered in rice remnants and strongly warned by Ranjith and Sumathy several times not to drink the water or eat the food, we walked over in what we were wearing (me in a salwar kamiz, Kate in a beaded floor length skirt and a long t shirt). We were warmly greeted by the father of one of the girls and smiled at by all of the women at the party. We made the usual whimpering noises through our smiles that we make when we have no clue what to say or do but want to make the right impression. The two girls were dazzling in new bright sari's, covered in garlands of flowers and adorned shiny jewels dangling from their wrists, ankles, foreheads and noses. They knelt and bowed at the feet of the older man who brought us there, a sign of respect by 'dusting' the dirt off of his feet. The father said to us, "You do us great honor by coming here and giving them your blessing" and before we knew it, they were kneeling at our feet. This felt entirely awkward and inappropriate to our politically correct, liberal-minded Western upbringing, and we started to back away and say 'No, no' but they were already on the ground. Kate and I looked at each other, laughing with nervousness. Then the girl kneeling at Kate's feet started to stand, catching her headdress on the edge of Kate's skirt. Kate squealed as her skirt started to go above her knees, and both she and the girl turned bright red as they tried to disentangle the beads of Kate's skirt from her jewelry. Everyone at the party found this entirely hilarious, and Kate and I, out of breath from laughing, said goodbye, bowed and walked home marveling at how strange it was that our lives had led up to this moment. But then again, we have said that nearly every day that we've been here.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
School days
The days have been flying slowly by, to use a play on words, and we are realizing our time here is winding down to an end. We still have enough time to fill our lifetime quota(yah right!) of nose wiping, mess cleaning and random other baby tasks but to just be with the kids is coming to a close. It's something we knew would hit hard but even with a month left, its hard to face the inevitable end!
But to get to an exciting part, we used the last bit of the donation fund to allow 4 of the kids to attend school! The children start school at the tender age of 3 and are thrust into learning english, addition and subtraction, basic sentence structure, etc. It's amazing what they need to know even to get in! Ali and I went through the admission process with Ranjani, Subash, Bharthi and Sharda, which consisted of them sitting in front of an administrator and answering questions about objects, all in english. These children DO NOT speak english at all, except for the few phrases we were told to teach and numbers/months/alphabet. They were scared to death, barely opening their mouths to breathe a word, but the teacher saw potential and allowed them in. We were all so excited and relieved because failure to get in would mean another year of waiting before admissions open again. However, after all that, the school would not allow the students any monetary concessions and were charging each child Rps 25,000 to attend, roughly
$625. Obviously, money is a bit of an issue for so many children so Sumathy and Ranjith found another school that accepted their previous admission and charged only Rps 11,000 each ($275). The school has a great reputation and though it is a bit farther away, the education the children will receive is worth it.
Sumathy and Ranjith personally give a huge internet "THANK YOU" to all who donated before we left and after we got here. All the money has been put directly towards the children's benefit, Susan and I made sure of that, and the impact every dollar has made is tremendous. So thank you again from Susan and I for the support you have given us this entire time. The experience has been so extremely rewarding, even at the most trying of times! A special shout out to Natasha Latta for her amazing package filled with goodies for the kids, those puzzles and flashcards are perfect and will be well used. Another big thanks to Laurie Irwin for her package of baby wipes, coloring books and miscellaneous toys. These children receive the gifts like its Christmas and love hearing about people from home and seeing pictures on the internet.
There is so much happening every day and so many stories to share, it's almost impossible to record it all. One of our favorite things, though, is taking 11-yr-old Venkej (i'm impossible with spelling the kid's names right!) with us when we go to the store or wherever. The children rarely get time out so when they do, it is all new. We went shopping last night for some groceries and allowed him his very own pack of bubble gum and an ice cream. Oh man, his face was priceless! He couldn't stop smiling the whole way home. Becca took some of the children to the hospital for check-ups this morning and he accompanied her. The highlight? Riding the elevator up and down, up and down, up and down..... things we take for granted! His favorite American slang is "fo'shore" with a head nod and fist pound. We are teaching them well :)
But to get to an exciting part, we used the last bit of the donation fund to allow 4 of the kids to attend school! The children start school at the tender age of 3 and are thrust into learning english, addition and subtraction, basic sentence structure, etc. It's amazing what they need to know even to get in! Ali and I went through the admission process with Ranjani, Subash, Bharthi and Sharda, which consisted of them sitting in front of an administrator and answering questions about objects, all in english. These children DO NOT speak english at all, except for the few phrases we were told to teach and numbers/months/alphabet. They were scared to death, barely opening their mouths to breathe a word, but the teacher saw potential and allowed them in. We were all so excited and relieved because failure to get in would mean another year of waiting before admissions open again. However, after all that, the school would not allow the students any monetary concessions and were charging each child Rps 25,000 to attend, roughly
$625. Obviously, money is a bit of an issue for so many children so Sumathy and Ranjith found another school that accepted their previous admission and charged only Rps 11,000 each ($275). The school has a great reputation and though it is a bit farther away, the education the children will receive is worth it.
Sumathy and Ranjith personally give a huge internet "THANK YOU" to all who donated before we left and after we got here. All the money has been put directly towards the children's benefit, Susan and I made sure of that, and the impact every dollar has made is tremendous. So thank you again from Susan and I for the support you have given us this entire time. The experience has been so extremely rewarding, even at the most trying of times! A special shout out to Natasha Latta for her amazing package filled with goodies for the kids, those puzzles and flashcards are perfect and will be well used. Another big thanks to Laurie Irwin for her package of baby wipes, coloring books and miscellaneous toys. These children receive the gifts like its Christmas and love hearing about people from home and seeing pictures on the internet.
There is so much happening every day and so many stories to share, it's almost impossible to record it all. One of our favorite things, though, is taking 11-yr-old Venkej (i'm impossible with spelling the kid's names right!) with us when we go to the store or wherever. The children rarely get time out so when they do, it is all new. We went shopping last night for some groceries and allowed him his very own pack of bubble gum and an ice cream. Oh man, his face was priceless! He couldn't stop smiling the whole way home. Becca took some of the children to the hospital for check-ups this morning and he accompanied her. The highlight? Riding the elevator up and down, up and down, up and down..... things we take for granted! His favorite American slang is "fo'shore" with a head nod and fist pound. We are teaching them well :)
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Back at Balagurukulam
This is our second day back after our two week break up north, and we had an exciting trip to the hospital this morning. Last night Sumathy told us to be up at 6 am to bath and dress 11 of the babies, and to be ready to depart at 8. Baby mayhem ensued, as usual. The infants have been moved down to the main dormitory, where all of the other kids sleep, and so it was extra messy waking up the babies and dodging all the extra waste piles that accrued in the night. Apu, one of the youngest at 10 months or so, was sitting in a constellation of bright yellow mounds of poop, but didn't start crying until I picked her up out of it and Becca dumped cold water on her head in the shower. We got them all ready but then had to sit for about an hour before the taxi showed up.
The hospital was nice, much better than the "Emergency Room" I visited with Sumathy a few weeks ago where we took one of the kids to get an injection of some kind for their cold. Becca, Kate and I took turns watching smaller groups of the kids in a waiting area while they were whisked off to get X-rays done, visit with the doctor, and have blood drawn for HIV, Hepatitus and TB tests. Not surprisingly the last one wasn't terribly pleasant. The other half of the babies had their tests done the day before, and somehow they knew the results the day after. I was a little confused since I didn't think that HIV test results came back so quickly, but didn't have much time to think about it since Sumathy whispered it to me while we were pinning Rupa to the table for her injections. She also said that the family doctor who had visited at the orphanage suspected that two or three of the kids might have HIV. Shortly after telling me that, the nurses screwed up by poking Rupa two times before getting the needle in a vein. I was holding her body still and standing over her head, trying to whisper something reassuring, when the second nurse let go of the arm the needle was in. Rupa reflexively bent her arm, stabbing herself deeper with the needle and causing more bleeding (and screaming). It was a chaotic moment, and even though Sumathy had told me that all of the tests from the day before had come back negative, I couldn't help but feel a little nervous since they didn't even sanitize the table in between children. I'm not sure they even changed their gloves. Thankfully, Kate and Becca took turns with that chore. We all left a little shell shocked and probably just a little less relieved than the kids were that it was over.
Most days are not this intense. It does feel good to be back, plus the kitchen has running water now and the internet is hooked up here, so quality of life has improved a bit.
Here are a few pictures (finally):
This is a group of napping 3 year olds.
This is Sumathy and Ranjith during a badminton break.
Apu, sitting in one of the saree cradles.
At the second wedding we went to. I'm not sure why Indians don't smile for pictures, but they were actually having fun even though it doesn't look like it.
Dolled up in our saree's and presenting the groom's gift from the bride, Vanna White style.Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Northern Thoughts
Have a brief moment to jot down some thoughts before Indian adventures suck me back into the streets. This time I'm writing from New Dehli and on a time constraint of our own, as long as the electricity holds out, so I don't feel as rushed as the Ambattur blogs. Susan, Ali, Becca and I have planned a 2 week trip up north to visit the sites, such as the Taj Mahal(who could come to this beautiful country and not see its prize posession?) and trek over to Rajisthan(spelling is off im sure) for a real camping trip on Camels. It's been exciting for us to breathe after a month of gogogo with the kids and various tasks.
We left the orphanage on the night of the 25th, telling the children we would be back and to please remember us when we did! Of course, silly of me to think they would forget us because they ALL came out waving our auto away at 10 p.m., sad to see us go but excited because we would be back soon. It made my heart glad to see how much they love us and the impact we have had with our short time there thus far. Sumathy says that they will ask her every day where we are and constantly check our rooms for any sign of the "sisters".
Speaking of sisters, I am now labeled "doctor" sister because of the minor first aid we have taken upon ourselves for the children of the orphanage. It has been mostly scrapes and bleeding from ankles and the such, but Varuna, an 7 or 8 year old boy, was a serious case. He spilled boiling water on his foot, which proceeded to blister and pop in the day before he even said anything about pain. I mean, serious doctor here, about 40 percent of his foot was open sores and to mix that with the sand and filth in the orphanage, it was just a matter of time before that thing got seriously infected! Luckily, I was able to use the bandaids, gauze, neosporin and hydrogen peroxide donated by the people of Valdez(Thank you so much!!!) to clean and cover it as best as we could. He was an amazing kid, softly saying "pain" when they bubbling of the hydrogen peroxide got to him but keeping a smile on his face the entire way. I have so much respect and awe for these children and their pain threshold, I think i would be screaming and yelling at anyone who was doing that to me! It was a good feeling though, for him to come up to me everyday and ask for a new bandage and more 'water' for his foot. The bubbling action is something those kids love to gather around and watch, think it is the coolest thing ever.
So we are gone until the 11th, taking some time to see different parts of India but mostly we have been just talking about our favorite moments with the children, looking at the pictures we have in our cameras, and laughing at the all around silliness of mis-communication issues with Sumathy and Ranjith. Excited about all the upcoming adventures!
We left the orphanage on the night of the 25th, telling the children we would be back and to please remember us when we did! Of course, silly of me to think they would forget us because they ALL came out waving our auto away at 10 p.m., sad to see us go but excited because we would be back soon. It made my heart glad to see how much they love us and the impact we have had with our short time there thus far. Sumathy says that they will ask her every day where we are and constantly check our rooms for any sign of the "sisters".
Speaking of sisters, I am now labeled "doctor" sister because of the minor first aid we have taken upon ourselves for the children of the orphanage. It has been mostly scrapes and bleeding from ankles and the such, but Varuna, an 7 or 8 year old boy, was a serious case. He spilled boiling water on his foot, which proceeded to blister and pop in the day before he even said anything about pain. I mean, serious doctor here, about 40 percent of his foot was open sores and to mix that with the sand and filth in the orphanage, it was just a matter of time before that thing got seriously infected! Luckily, I was able to use the bandaids, gauze, neosporin and hydrogen peroxide donated by the people of Valdez(Thank you so much!!!) to clean and cover it as best as we could. He was an amazing kid, softly saying "pain" when they bubbling of the hydrogen peroxide got to him but keeping a smile on his face the entire way. I have so much respect and awe for these children and their pain threshold, I think i would be screaming and yelling at anyone who was doing that to me! It was a good feeling though, for him to come up to me everyday and ask for a new bandage and more 'water' for his foot. The bubbling action is something those kids love to gather around and watch, think it is the coolest thing ever.
So we are gone until the 11th, taking some time to see different parts of India but mostly we have been just talking about our favorite moments with the children, looking at the pictures we have in our cameras, and laughing at the all around silliness of mis-communication issues with Sumathy and Ranjith. Excited about all the upcoming adventures!
Sunday, February 17, 2008
"I yam... tree!"
That is 3 year old Subash's way of answering the question "How old are you?" Yesterday four of the kids - Sharadha, Bharathi, Ranjani and Subash, all 3 years old, took their entrance exam to get into a really good private international school. It is taught in English so they had to answer some basic questions that we have been trying to practice with them for the past few weeks. It took one week just to stop them from simply repeating the question back to us and another week to respond with the semi-complete answer. Subash now gives an adorable (in our eyes) pause in between "I am" and "three" since we would say only a few words at a time. Honestly, I'm sure they don't have a clue what all of it means (they're only three, after all), but I like that Ranjith and Sumathy are trying to get them into better schools instead of shoving all of them into government schools.
Ali Fischer and Becca Polk, Kate's cousin, arrived earlier this week and have jumped right in with all the kids. It is nice to have some more people around that you can just meet eyes with in the midst of all the craziness and just be able to laugh. There are fewer things that make you feel more pointless than trying to control a room full of 2 and 3 year olds that don't speak English. Chennai is in the state of Tamil Nadu and so they speak Tamil, one of the oldest languages in the world. I don't know much more than "go" "come" and "drink milk". I should be trying harder to learn more but they want us to speak English to the kids so that they can practice. It definitely would come in handy during the moments of 'baby mayhem' when we're trying to feed them (rice with our right hands of course) and half of the 19 babies (kids under three) are crying, covered in the food, and sitting in their own urine and shit. Did I mention that they don't wear diapers? We're in the habit of staring down to avoid the obstacle courses on the tiles.
Speaking of tiles, the have completed a lot of the construction on the new building, which has a decent-sized kitchen now, a dining hall large enough to seat everyone, and plans to build a new dorm on the second floor. And by construction I mean hand mixing cement and carrying it in little dishes on their heads, bending rebar with a mallet and a rock, and hand chipping tile in intricate designs for the flooring. I've never seen anything like it. We have some amazing luxuries with the hand tools and machines we use for building in the states. I have some great photos of the tilework they've done, and hopefully I'll get to an internet place that allows me to use the USB to upload them. So far now luck on that front.
FYI, the donated money has helped pay for the tile work as well as some of the new fans in the dining hall and will likely pay for those kids' first year of schooling (pending admission). We'll be letting you know what else its used for in the future. It is a huge stress reliever for Ranjith and Sumathy to be able to pay up front for some of these things, so thanks again to everyone who donated - the $3200 raised is going to go a long way here.
Hopefully more updates soon and more often, we're supposed to be getting the internet soon!
-Susan
Ali Fischer and Becca Polk, Kate's cousin, arrived earlier this week and have jumped right in with all the kids. It is nice to have some more people around that you can just meet eyes with in the midst of all the craziness and just be able to laugh. There are fewer things that make you feel more pointless than trying to control a room full of 2 and 3 year olds that don't speak English. Chennai is in the state of Tamil Nadu and so they speak Tamil, one of the oldest languages in the world. I don't know much more than "go" "come" and "drink milk". I should be trying harder to learn more but they want us to speak English to the kids so that they can practice. It definitely would come in handy during the moments of 'baby mayhem' when we're trying to feed them (rice with our right hands of course) and half of the 19 babies (kids under three) are crying, covered in the food, and sitting in their own urine and shit. Did I mention that they don't wear diapers? We're in the habit of staring down to avoid the obstacle courses on the tiles.
Speaking of tiles, the have completed a lot of the construction on the new building, which has a decent-sized kitchen now, a dining hall large enough to seat everyone, and plans to build a new dorm on the second floor. And by construction I mean hand mixing cement and carrying it in little dishes on their heads, bending rebar with a mallet and a rock, and hand chipping tile in intricate designs for the flooring. I've never seen anything like it. We have some amazing luxuries with the hand tools and machines we use for building in the states. I have some great photos of the tilework they've done, and hopefully I'll get to an internet place that allows me to use the USB to upload them. So far now luck on that front.
FYI, the donated money has helped pay for the tile work as well as some of the new fans in the dining hall and will likely pay for those kids' first year of schooling (pending admission). We'll be letting you know what else its used for in the future. It is a huge stress reliever for Ranjith and Sumathy to be able to pay up front for some of these things, so thanks again to everyone who donated - the $3200 raised is going to go a long way here.
Hopefully more updates soon and more often, we're supposed to be getting the internet soon!
-Susan
Sunday, February 10, 2008
2 weeks?
Its hard to believe its already been two weeks. It feels like we've been here a lot longer, but also that we just got here. The days feel slow and hot (its in the upper 80s with 95% humidity), but its surprising how much has happened. We stay in a little room that is connected to the main dormitory, and spend most of the day with the kids. There are 43 of them, from 4 months old to 14 years old, and the each one's story of how they were abandoned is sadder is sadder than the next. The oldest one, a 14 year old boy, was a 4 year old slave in a mine up north, and Ranjith bought him for 2000 rupees ($50) and took him home as his own. Somya, a 3 year old girl, survived an attempted murder by her parents, who tried to split her head and leave her in the gutter as an infant. She has some disabilities because of it, and a scar on her head, but she is healthy, happy and loves to draw. These stories are too horrible to believe, but the knowledge that there are good people like Ranjith and Sumathy out there makes it a little more bearable.
Unfortunately, the internet is extremely slow here, as is the delay on the keyboard, so I have to cut this shorter than I'd like.
Unfortunately, the internet is extremely slow here, as is the delay on the keyboard, so I have to cut this shorter than I'd like.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
We're heerrrree
Wow, this is going to be a quick and hasty post but I wanted to tell you all we made it safe and sound and it is amazing. Sumathy and Ranjith are two of the most incredible people ever and take such good care of us and tell us to treat it all as our home. The children are absolutely adorable and the most caring children i have ever met. They take care of each other amazingly well, including feeding, waking up, showering.... basically, Susan and I are told to teach them English and love them and hold them. They won't let us lift a finger to clean or help with dishes or anything. They call us 'sister' and 'madame' and have the most amazing smiles in the world. Every single one of them, even under the most heartbreaking early life stories imaginable, are kind, helpfull, and just happy to receive a smile from us. I want to just bring them all home, but sadly India does not allow adoptions. So unbelievable, there are so many amazing children needing homes but these kids, they are in such a good place, I don't think they could be loved anymore.
Even as tired as both Susan and I are, we both know we made the right choice and for everyone reading this who donated money, clothing, time, whatever it was, rest assured that every bit of it is going to a wonderful place for children who will love it all!
We will take pictures and post them up to show the new dormitory to be built, as well as the new kitchen and dining room. And, of course, the children.... many many MANY pics of the children to come soon! Thanks to all, keep us in your thoughts, and know we are safe and sound and doing good things!
Even as tired as both Susan and I are, we both know we made the right choice and for everyone reading this who donated money, clothing, time, whatever it was, rest assured that every bit of it is going to a wonderful place for children who will love it all!
We will take pictures and post them up to show the new dormitory to be built, as well as the new kitchen and dining room. And, of course, the children.... many many MANY pics of the children to come soon! Thanks to all, keep us in your thoughts, and know we are safe and sound and doing good things!
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Pre-departure
We'd just like to say a big thank you to everyone who donated clothes, let us post flyers, gave money to the orphanage, ate at Bill Bixby's fundraiser dinner, put us on the radio, the list goes on. Seriously, the support everyone has shown was overwhelming, and we're excited to get over to Chennai to see how all of these efforts pan out. I'm taking an extra piece of luggage filled with donated children's clothing and Kate is taking a bag of medical supplies, and we've sent two boxes filled with more items so hopefully those arrive safely.
Between all the personal donations and the fundraising dinner that Bill Bixby put on and Ryan, Mei Mei and Ali served (thanks, guys), we've raised over $3,000 for the orphanage! We'll definitely be posting some photos and describing what the money will go toward. Its inspiring how supportive the entire town of Valdez has been. Thanks again to the Catholic Church, A Rogue's Garden and KVAK for letting us leave the drop boxes there, and also thank you to the Star, KVAK and KCHU for all the coverage.
A very, very big thank you again to everyone who donated. Its unique to have a chance to make a donation and see the results, so I hope that Kate and I can provide ample opportunity for you to do so.
We both leave tomorrow morning, Kate from Phoenix and I leave from LA, and if all goes well then I'll arrive 3 hours ahead of Kate in Chennai, then we'll meet up and head to the orphanage.
The website to the orphanage is www.balagurukulam.org and we will post some more background information once we're over there.
Between all the personal donations and the fundraising dinner that Bill Bixby put on and Ryan, Mei Mei and Ali served (thanks, guys), we've raised over $3,000 for the orphanage! We'll definitely be posting some photos and describing what the money will go toward. Its inspiring how supportive the entire town of Valdez has been. Thanks again to the Catholic Church, A Rogue's Garden and KVAK for letting us leave the drop boxes there, and also thank you to the Star, KVAK and KCHU for all the coverage.
A very, very big thank you again to everyone who donated. Its unique to have a chance to make a donation and see the results, so I hope that Kate and I can provide ample opportunity for you to do so.
We both leave tomorrow morning, Kate from Phoenix and I leave from LA, and if all goes well then I'll arrive 3 hours ahead of Kate in Chennai, then we'll meet up and head to the orphanage.
The website to the orphanage is www.balagurukulam.org and we will post some more background information once we're over there.
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